Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
where does the pee come out of this thing
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Randomize
