Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Randomize
