guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize