for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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