Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
