This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
