is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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