He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I am naked and annoyed.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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