I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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