i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Randomize
