what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
...so i touched it.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
