The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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