He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Randomize
