we're blogging at a bar
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Randomize
