PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
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