theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
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