Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
