Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
