Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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