i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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