You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
foreskin is a definite game changer
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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