she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
