McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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