Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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