I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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