Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
