Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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