and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Randomize
