I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
