nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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