Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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