and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
where does the pee come out of this thing
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
