I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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