he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Randomize
