do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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