It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
