Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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