i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
