everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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