At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
