I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
