What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize