the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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