btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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