he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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