Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
