doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
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