Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Randomize
