I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize
