Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize