Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize